Diaper Dooty: The Sequel

CANNONBALL RUNS

Since the weather seems to be off and on, Cris and I take advantage of every good day to get Owen outdoors. So last Saturday, we went for a lovely morning walk along the Aberoteum. This little jaunt included me breastfeeding on a picnic table, where I think I froze my nipples and stomach, but at least the bicyclist got a "picturesque ride". Afterwards, we decide to head down town for a little lunch.

On the way there, the old familiar rumbling begin, followed by that not so sweet baby smell. We had decided to go to lunch at Zak's just to have the Deep Fried Mars bar for dessert. Zaks is great for a greasy spoon but questionable for diaper changes. We didn't think they even had a change table in their washrooms. So I had the great idea of just using the front passenger seat of our car.

So Cris lays out all the items and we recline the seat back as much as it can, but it's not quite flat (it hits the baby seat in the back). I, being the smart mother, state we must put Owen with his head on the actual back part and his bum on the seat (as if he really were seating in the seat) because of course the other way he is liable to push off the seat and end up on the floor. All is going well untill we have to wipe the bum. I lift his legs up and he starts wailing away. What could possibly be wrong?? Well any normal mother would have pointed out two things:

First, if you looked carefully, you would see I was folding my son exactly in half, like a taco. And apparently babies don't like to kiss their knees. So no gymnast here.

Second, his knees weren't the only thing he was going to be kissing. The "bits and pieces" were a little too close to his face. And based on history, we know how disasterous that can be.

So we flipped him around and just made sure he didn't fall off. He had managed to poop all up the front this time. No idea how. But of course, we have to change the shirt. So here we are, our little guy is sitting in his diaper naked on our front seat. I start to put on a new shirt and think he still smells of poop. We check all around and can't find anything. We then realise the shirt that we have pulled over his head is a dirty one from God knows when. At least it's dry (if you catch my drift). So we undress him again and put on another clean shirt. We managed to get him dressed and survive another day. And it turns out Zaks had a change table in the washroom. And the Mars bar wasn't that good, but only because I remembered I don't like Mars bars.

So Mommy demerit points deducted for poor wiping, bad attire and a 6$ melted chocolate bar.