Diaper Dooty

Even with the creation of these fabulous new diapers with velcro tabs and gigalastic (huh?), we still manage to have lots of accidents. Maybe I am using them wrong. I know which way is up and front vs. back... but it still manages to "escape" me. I thought I would start to share some of the stories rather than embarrass myself in silence.

Episode I: Revenge of the Piss

We are out enjoying a lovely dinner at Swiss Chalet with my brother and Tara. All is going well until we hear that all too familiar sound of a low rumbling and a lovely grunting. Such effort for something so...well I leave that to you.

So I volunteer to take the booger to the bathroom. The restaurant is equipped with one of the worst placed changing tables. Right by the door and not designed for a lefty like me. And it has no strap to hold Owen down. He likes to kick now and can propel himself across a table if not stopped. So I proceed to strip him down and see that common sight of of a yellow strip across his undershirt. Lovely. But thankfully it hasn't soaked through to his pants. So I take off his diaper and with limited space place it at the end of the table by Owen's feet. I can't throw it out because the garbage is across the room and if I go Owen will be across the floor! Even I know that is bad.

So I proceed to wipe his bum and back off. Big mistake. I of course got cocky and didn't cover up the "loaded weapon". As I am wiping him down he starts to make funny noise. I guess the noises anyone would make if they were peeing on their own face. Yikes! Bad mothering 101.

I feel horrible that he now has pee on his chest and face and have to completely wipe him down. I manage to get him clean and diapered and then realise that he has been kicking and bashing away at the dirty diaper and now has poop all over his socks. I think this is the point when they revoke your mother license. So I have to take off his socks, gingerly. I still don't like getting my hands dirty- mother or not. Of course I don't have any extra socks. So he can't wear the jeans he has been wearing as he is now barefoot (it is winter after all). Thank god I have packed a pair of pants with feet in them.

All in all the worst diaper changing on my record. I think I got two demerit points.

Moral of the story: When it looks like rain, don't take any chances.