Formal complaint

Dear Tooth Fairy Inc.,

First, I would like to thank you for all your company's support in the early 80's. I was the beneficiary of $3.00 from your organization in your recycling program. I am pleased to report that the funds were put to good use and were greatly appreciated. I am however writing to you to log a complaint about your Teething program.

We had heard many good things about your Basic Teething program and were very excited to join. However, we did not receive any service till a week ago while most others we know have been receiving service for at least a few months. This delay has resulted in delayed chewing, toothless smiles and general mockery from peers.

We have also been subject to your services at times that are most inconvenient for us. I would like to formally request that all teething take place from 8:00 a.m. to 6:00 p.m. This 2-hour 2:30 a.m. service is not acceptable.

We also had hoped that this program would be delivered quickly and efficiently. Yet we have received it neither way. Your program has made our client turn into a drooling, cranky, crying mess. It has also lasted about 7 days. We would like to see a quick end to this program in a friendly manner. However, if we are not satisfied by the end of this week, we will cancel this program all together.

We are also not sure if you are to blame for this new body rash. If so, we ask you to cease that service as it was not ordered with the Basic Teething Program.

We appreciate your immediate attention to these matters and we look forward to having teeth in the next few days. Should we not receive any teeth by Friday, September 30th, you will hear from our lawyer as our sanity will not last beyond that. We hope this can be resolved quickly and we look forward to being a part of the recycling program in a few years.

Regards,

Teething in Ottawa

P.S. I also feel I must apologize for any remarks made against your organization in the month of June and August. We realize we slandered your name when we thought we were receiving poor services from your organization. We realize after that fact that it was in fact the Urinary Team that was providing poor quality work. Our apologies for any harm our poor taste in language may have caused. Thank you.